Wednesday, January 4, 2012

"Don't Call me Shirley." (Weigh In Wednesday)

It's time to report in, everyone. You got a pass (as did I) last week because of my birthday but frankly, it's time to step back on the scale or simply to step back into the light of honesty and report in on your progress. I will tell you, for all my tips posted, I did follow the correct portions. I just didn't follow the whole, "don't pick" or "pick honestly approach."  I can also be honest in telling you that I was feeling it. I felt like I was back sliding. I actually woke up on Monday eager to exercise and start eating healthier again.

I have decided I'm going to celebrate that little victory. It means I've changed my eating habits enough that when I get off track, my body notices and craves otherwise.

I have to celebrate this because my scale, apparently, hates me. I know, it's a scale, it has no personality but MINE DOES! It talked to me today, my friends, and it wasn't pretty.  No, I'm not kidding. It went something like this.

I step on the scale and wait while the scale cycles through to decide how much I weigh. How bad I've been, measured in numbers.  The scale doesn't show the numbers.  I step off, and step on again. I wait for the numbers. They don't come. At this point I mutter something like, "come on, what's going on? I know I'm standing on it correctly for the sensors."
And then, I get an answer. "You are standing right. I'm just not telling you the numbers. Don't make me."

"But I want to know."

"I'm not telling you. All I will tell you is you are lucky you ran out of peanut butter cookies when you did because you would really be in a bad place otherwise."

"Okay, I didn't do well, I get it.  Just give me the number so I know what I have to work with."

"Peanut butter cookies, that's all I've got to say."

"Clearly, you have more to say."

"Alright, yes, I do. Peanut butter cookies and ham and bread. At least you ate your vegetables becuase if you didn't, you wouldn't have gone #2 regularly and the number would be even higher."

"I can't believe you just talked about my bowel movements.  Just show me the numbers!"

"I'll tell you this. Do you remember what you started at?"


"You aren't above that number."


"You are at that number."

sigh - "I suppose it's better than being above it."

"True, chubby."



"You called me chubby."

"No, you made that up. I would never do any such thing. I know how big you are... I mean little you are. You step on me every Wednesday, remember? I'd never call you chubby.  I might liken you to Chunk from the Goonies but I'd never say 'Chubby'. "

"I can't believe this, you are way out of line."

In a raised voice, "You asked me, don't get all upset because I'm telling you what you repeatedly stated you want to hear. Some people just can't take the truth and it never fails. I'm always the messenger they want to shoot."

"Goodness, something is surely this morning. Did I hurt your feelings?"

"Humph, no. And don't call me Shirley. I'm your scale and that's all I'll ever be."


And that, my friends, is the Weigh In Wednesday that hase left me traumatized.  At least I've started exercising again (30 min on the elliptical Monday and Tuesday with plans to continue 6 out of 7 days this week).

How did you manage your goals over the holidays?



Nana B said...

I was pretty bad over the holidays - oh well. December 31 I cleaned up my eating act. Our NY eve was early to bed early to rise feeling Great on New Years Day.

Good Luck Everyone

Issabella The Cat said...

Feeling your pain, mine now scream "get off you're hurting me!" when I stand on them.

Who knew chocs,cheese, xmas cake and everything else that was waved upper my nose could have such a devastating effect in only 2 weeks lol

I. joined. The. Gym.

I work out at home and have figured I need someone to shout at me to make me work harder :(

rubyslipperz said...

Thaz fun-neeee, girl!!...a scale talking to ya. =P

But...mine didn't give me such great numbers this last Saturday. I'm up FIVE pounds since the beginning of December 2011. =(

I'm on a mission this week to get as much off as I can with eating better and exercise. This coming
Saturday...will be the tale.


Shay said...

Talking Scales? Eeeekkk! I dont want a set of those.

I jumped on the scales this week expecting to jump off horrified and I was fine ...maybe my metabolism is finally starting to behave like a 12 year old boys!

Im sure you'll drop those pounds girl.