I should be ashamed of myself

Look to the right on the informatoin bar. Do you see that section which says "Want to, WiPs and Completed Quilts 2013"?  

I have not been adding to it. I think I completed a couple of quilts since Jan. now that I think about it so that's good and I should add them but that original list? Not a single movement has been made with it other than blocks for SIL's quilt. 

Shameful

execpt

I have just had too much fun starting new projects! Now you know why I should be, but am not, ashamed of myself. :-)

Cheers!
Beck

Dirty little secrets - FTF

It's St. Patty's day and being a good non-Irish woman, I use this holiday to pretend I'm Irish and further to celebrate the "just another excuse to party" day.  Also, it's a little early but I'm coming back on board with Favorite Things Friday and that is "Dirty Little Secrets".

Today I cooked corned beef and cabbage (with carrots, onions and potatos of course!). Thought my DD would hate it (hubs and boys were gone tonight) but we both LOVED it. She's even having a corned beef sandwich tomorrow!

This may not seem very newsworthy to you but truth be told, I thought I was the only one in a household of 5 that liked corned beef and now, since I have 1 more person who likes it, to me, that means I get to cook it more than 1x per year! HOORAY!

The hubs will have to deal. That's my dirty little secret #1.

Dirty little secret #2:  I had 2 glasses of wine tonight and I'm going on my third. Regardless of tomorrow being a work day, I'm thinking of drowning my sorrows in a 4th!

Dirty little secret #3: I am on Skype as Sarcastic Quilter.  I've been logging in lately by it's rare that my 4 friends are on. If you don't mind someone who looks like she doesn't know what makeup and hairstyling are, reach out to me. :)

Dirty little secret #4: I'm really enjoying the Live Destination Truth episode in Ireland on Syfy right now. I'm not sure if it's the wine, my mini crush on Josh Gates or both but I'm staying here tonight.

Dirty litte secret #5: I love college basketball but apparently, with my wine and the hubs gone, I like Josh Gates mroe and am watching Syfy instead of March Madness!

Dirty litte secret #6: I have no sorrows so I have no excuse with item #2.

Dirty litte secret #7: I read classic novels and fantasy sci-fi novels about paranormal things (look up Kat Richardson's Greywalker series to know what I mean) but then every now and then I read, *GASP*,  erotica.  You know, those freebies you can read?  Are you scared yet? Curiosity gets the better of me so I'll download a free thing sometimes.  Honest to God, sometimes I read it and think, really? People do that?  Other times I wonder... could I ever lay there as long as some of the freaking scenes they describe without starting to think about bills, tomorrow's to do list, the bathroom needing cleaning, the dogs needing a bath, did I sign up to bring snacks to the soccer game, etc.  I mean honestly ladies, you understand don't you? Erotica is nothing more than impossible fantasy to me because the second my brain is intrigued is the SAME SECOND my brain breaks it down by reminding me of reality. Then I laugh at how ridiculous it all is. I may think of myself as a pretty little, tight bodied 20-something but reality breaks it down to  the older, baby flabbing, lazy and strict sleep-scheduled 30-something that I am. 

Dirty litte secret #8: I thoroughly enjoyed grossing you all out with Dirty litte secret #7. It's not real folks. Wipe those dirty little images from your mind!

Dirty litte secret #9: I am very afraid I'll screw up the paper-piecing instrucstions for the quilt along even though I know you will still love me even if I do.

and lastly:
Dirty litte secret #10: hubs is out this evening and Josh Gates and Dirty litte secret #7 are my only comfort.  Now you know why I'm going to go and pour myself a 4th glass (see Dirty litte secret #2).

Got any Dirty little secrets you want to share? Come on... I won't tell anyone!

(ps - ETA that I stopped at 3. My body wanted water instead. What can I say, I'm no longer in college. :D)

Happy St. Patty's Day!
Beck

What is this ailment called?

Sick, sick, sick. What is wrong with me? I'm crazy... sick.

Did you notice I added a new button to the side of my blog? PS I Quilt Postage Stamp quilt along. 

Like I didn't have enough to do. 

There's something wrong with me.

I have to finish up the Christmas Quilts for my friend and her 2 girls (which I hadn't finished or added them to my 2011 UFO b/c I REFUSE to let them linger longer than next week).  Then I have my monochromatic block (at least it's only one block and it the longest part of making it is actually finding the right fabrics, then I have my Summer Porch quilt to finish.

Along with that, I want to finish the Make Life quilt so I can send it on its way and not dally any longer.

I'm sick, sick, sick to add in a quilt along.  (Oh, and you may think it's not so bad but please realize, I decided to double the qulit along quilt size so I can put it on the bed for hubs and I)  -sigh- 

Any idea what this ailment is called?

Ringing in the new year

Ladies and gentlemen,
I'd love to ring in the new year with you with a look back at what I've done this past 2010 but frankly, one minute I look at it and say it's too much to list, the other, I can barely remember a thing.

Then I think about listing my quilts in a pretty little montage but did you know I'm just enough of a perfectionist that if I forgot one, I'd be really annoyed?  (Plus, I don't know how to montage and Flickr sends me to Snapfish who wants to charge me for a poster.)

So I thought maybe I'd just enjoy everyone else's posts and simply say, Happy New Year.

Until I saw Yahoo headlines.  Gee, I love Yahoo some days. Full of inspiration.

This is what I saw: "2011 Astrology Predcitions."

I LOVE how this became a headline! (Not really.)  Of course, I had to go read and then I had to post. 

I won't bore you with my romantic horoscope because I'm happily married and frankly, I'm not sure the hubs would appreciate knowing I have been given carte blanche by the stars to be more self-centered in my relationship or that I can "expect a windfall of romantic interludes" this summer.  Yes, sometimes, this Capricorn doesnt charge right in to butt heads, but takes the longer way around the mountain if that's the most advantageous path. So, ixnay on the omanceray. (Is that successful pig latin?)

Now, I WILL bore you with a summary of my other two predictions just to illustrate for you why these things work and suck you in.

My overall prediction for 2011 basically states that I've weathered a bunch of change recently (uh yeah) and that I'm getting used to it and getting stronger for it. (That's good because I feel a whole lot more tired.) It goes on to disappointingly state that for the next 14 years or so I can basically expect more change but won't I be a super human after that with all my strength?  Okay, it doesn't say I'll be a super human but I do have to wonder what is the point of being so strong after 14 years of "shedding layers" and change if I'm too tired to live a life?

And then there is this, "This year the focus shifts from a lifestyle focused on gadgets, information and social networking to introspection, home and family."  I'm sorrry my new and old friends. This now gives me carte blanche to be even more distracted away from my blog and you all.  The stars said so.

"You are about to encounter your most uncensored raw self on levels as of yet unprecedented. Ready yourself, Goat, because this spring an explosion of fiery planets in Aries sweeps the very base of your horoscope getting you back in touch with some of your most primal instincts. Competition, aggression and the need for plenty of physical outlets ensue." What the hell, maybe I should take up mixed martial arts with all this prognosticating.   It's either that or, combined with my career horoscope, I'm going to be crazy competitive in my quilting.  What do you think? Want to take me on in a quilt throw down? Just let me figure out how that could be done and I'm there, baby!

The money part, sure, it could apply. Nice to know I'll be a freaking miser for the next 14 years but don't you worry people. Even though the stars say I will be ignorning you often, apparently when I do have something to say, it will be "In any case, your way with words is apt to become poetic and inspired, which can only make the world appear infinitely more beautiful."

Have you had enough or do you want to know what is predicted for my very predicatable career?  Okay, you asked for it. It looks like I am going to make my career even more important over my domesticity this year.  Now, I wondered how the heck that could be since I just didn't think I was doing that in my current job. I work often but not to the point of losing many family hours. Then I realized, maybe this is a lead in to what I've been wanting to do but have hesitated to do for a while now. I don't know... it says March to May will be the worse. I wonder how that's going to happen since March is the Lancaster Quilt show and April is the Paducah one and I'm certain I plan on quilt show hopping as much as possible this year! lol

This part, though. This really scares me. "There is just so much going on at such an alarming speed that even you -- one of the most grounded and head-strong signs of the zodiac -- could suffer from an oversight or two."  What ELSE can go on and happen. I thought LAST year was full of breakneck speed changes and happenings. ARGH!!  (When I write to complain and ask for help being picked up off the floor after life has wiped it with me, just remember I'll ask with poetic pizazz.)

"What you produce, practice and put out into the world will have reverberating consequences for the next 13 or so years so be sure that you only put out work that is top-notch (as if you could ever live with anything less)."  SHIT! I was hoping, in the next couple or few years that I could have a quilt related business just opening up. I was thinking of maybe even branching out with some feelers this year but hell, now I might just screw up if I do that b/c 13 years is a long time to get over putting out something that isn't top notch. 

But then, maybe not. "Late September-early October offer the best opportunities to get recognized for your efforts. With the monopoly of planets in Aries pushing you to put yourself out on a limb despite Saturn's usual reserve, risk-taking is infinitely rewarded in 2011. Go for it!"

And there you have it, the unvarnished truth of how my life will go in the year 2011. I hope your horoscope is less back and forth than mine.   (Or maybe you can have as much enjoyment and humor in readiny ours as I did mine.)

Cheers and Happy New Year!
Beck

The oddest muscle issue...

I have the strangest issue going on with my thigh, maybe a pull? I didn't pull the hamstring (thank goodness b/c that would really suck) and I didn't pull the front of the quad either. It's not the groin, it's somewhere behind the front of the quad but below the groin and still on the upper thigh.

I wondered what muscle it was so went and looked at a chart. I think it's the Abductor Longus muscle. Didn't know there were that many thigh muscles.

It doesn't hurt or ache except at the oddest times, like moving my legs to sit cross-legged, getting up from laying down, or (shock!) when I'm exercising with Jillian which I started again. Still, even then, it's a twinge more than pain but a twinge that clearly and loudly states, you have no strength to move that way. Yeah, actally, that's exactly what it's like. It's like I have one muscle in my leg that has decided it's not going to play with the others for now.

Ever had one of those kinds of twinges? They are so weird, right? I keep waiting for it to get better on it's own but can see it will be one of those drawn out, recurring items until just one day, it's gone. yuck. Well, at least it's not something worse.

Yes, clearly I've reached the point of boredom this evening that I felt the need to look that up and post it for you. Perhaps I'll retire to bed and just see you tomorrow.

Cheers! Beck

My mother tried to kill us

It's taken me a couple of days to recover from this but now that I have, I had to share with you the situation.  My mother decided to put her entire family out of their misery (or maybe she decided to end hers?) by killing us all on the same day.

The woman who has a nose to rival mine, which rivals that of the best bloodhounds, blissfully ignored the scents in her home and wafting out the front door on Thanksgiving Day.

We arrived Thursday mid-day to her condominium and looked at each other in wonder.  "Was that smell coming from Mom's house?" We questioned each other?  We got in the house, wished her a Happy Thanksgiving, then asked her what the smell was.

She wondered if it was the kitty litter Dad just took out to the garbage but no, it was too strong.  Then she finally wondered aloud if it was the turkey and then said she thought it was.  Uh, yeah Mom, play like you care now. That bird was almost cooked to the end. If you had meant to keep us safe you would have chucked it a while ago.    Thank goodness our own noses thwarted her! HA, take THAT mom!  We didn't want the Butterball Turkey anyway.

We took the bird and stuffing out to the back deck, shut the door and opened all other doors and windows to air the place out. Then we called around, found a almost completely thawed bird at a nearby store and went and bought it.  A water bath finished the thawing, some cutting and chopping produced a stuffing and we stuffed the bird, threw it in the oven and drank our afternoon away while it cooked.

(Oh yeah, and we Skyped Ms. Pyjamas - she's a follower and friend of mine and if you haven't visted her blog yet, get on over there. I met her husband via Skype, I thought it only fair she met my crazy family, too. I'll leave it to her to comment on first impressions. Let's just say, it wasn't pretty.)

Despite Mom's failed attempt at mass murder, my sisters and I took her with us to go shopping on Black Friday where, if you read this long, you now learn I SNAGGED the last GO cutter (not the baby but the regular one) for $200 at JoAnn's. They were on sale from $350 and I called hubby and he said, "Merry Christmas."  WOO-HOO!

Now, because dinner ended up fantastic, mom had plenty of wine on hand to assuage our indignity at her Agatha Christie plot, because mom made me go to JoAnn's so she could get me the pinking shears I asked for Christmas, and because I ended up with a GO cutter (only one die so far), I have decided the weekend worked out alright in the end and I love my Mother anyway.

So, a Happy belated Thanksgiving all and to my Mother, better luck next time. We outsmarted you this round! 

Cheers! Beck

Time for some GIRL POWER!

Sometimes my favorite poem pops into my head when I or a friend of mine needs a little incentive to stay strong, stay the course,  or keep the faith.  Other times, it’s just comical.

This is the poem:

The Female of the Species

WHEN the Himalayan peasant meets the he-bear in his pride,
He shouts to scare the monster, who will often turn aside.
But the she-bear thus accosted rends the peasant tooth and nail.
For the female of the species is more deadly than the male.

When Nag the basking cobra hears the careless foot of man,
He will sometimes wriggle sideways and avoid it if he can.
But his mate makes no such motion where she camps beside the trail.
For the female of the species is more deadly than the male.

When the early Jesuit fathers preached to Hurons and Choctaws,
They prayed to be delivered from the vengeance of the squaws.
'Twas the women, not the warriors, turned those stark enthusiasts pale.
For the female of the species is more deadly than the male.

Man's timid heart is bursting with the things he must not say,
For the Woman that God gave him isn't his to give away;
But when hunter meets with husbands, each confirms the other's tale—
The female of the species is more deadly than the male.

Man, a bear in most relations—worm and savage otherwise,—
Man propounds negotiations, Man accepts the compromise.
Very rarely will he squarely push the logic of a fact
To its ultimate conclusion in unmitigated act.

Fear, or foolishness, impels him, ere he lay the wicked low,
To concede some form of trial even to his fiercest foe.
Mirth obscene diverts his anger—Doubt and Pity oft perplex
Him in dealing with an issue—to the scandal of The Sex!

But the Woman that God gave him, every fibre of her frame
Proves her launched for one sole issue, armed and engined for the same;
And to serve that single issue, lest the generations fail,
The female of the species must be deadlier than the male.

She who faces Death by torture for each life beneath her breast
May not deal in doubt or pity—must not swerve for fact or jest.
These be purely male diversions—not in these her honour dwells—
She the Other Law we live by, is that Law and nothing else.

She can bring no more to living than the powers that make her great
As the Mother of the Infant and the Mistress of the Mate.
And when Babe and Man are lacking and she strides unclaimed to claim
Her right as femme (and baron), her equipment is the same.

She is wedded to convictions—in default of grosser ties;
Her contentions are her children, Heaven help him who denies!—
He will meet no suave discussion, but the instant, white-hot, wild,
Wakened female of the species warring as for spouse and child.

Unprovoked and awful charges—even so the she-bear fights,
Speech that drips, corrodes, and poisons—even so the cobra bites,
Scientific vivisection of one nerve till it is raw
And the victim writhes in anguish—like the Jesuit with the squaw!

So it comes that Man, the coward, when he gathers to confer
With his fellow-braves in council, dare not leave a place for her
Where, at war with Life and Conscience, he uplifts his erring hands
To some God of Abstract Justice—which no woman understands.

And Man knows it! Knows, moreover, that the Woman that God gave him
Must command but may not govern—shall enthral but not enslave him.
And She knows, because She warns him, and Her instincts never fail,
That the Female of Her Species is more deadly than the Male.

Rudyard Kipling (1865-1936)

Now tell me, who is the deadlier of the species here? My brother or me? Frankly, my brother thinks I could be mean enough to come out ahead… lol

 

(Still haven't gotten that fall turkey, though!)
 
Cheers!
Beck

O-M-G. Preakness Stakes and quilting. Sad day.

Yes, that's right. Maybe 3rd time will be the charm.

Preakness Stakes today and the hubs wasn't around to bet but I gave it a go. Just a little history. This post was written after the Kentucky Derby earlier this month.

What I didn't say was the horses the hubs chose were the same my gut instincts said to bet on but I talked myself out of. So, this time, I decided to bet straight from the gut.

Did I do it? Nope. I didn't. And again, if I had, I might have won a little spending money (I'm a $2 bet kind of gal so a win wouldn't net much.)  I looked at the horses and thought, "Lookin at Lucky is good." Then I thought, "I have to go with a horse named First Dude."  Finally, I looked and thought, "Jackson Bend is going to place today. I'm sure of it."

Those were my first thoughts. If I had boxed em, well, I'd have some quilt stash spending cash. But nope. I said, no way. Calvin Borel on Super Saver is a favorite. He's a great rider, he's messed me up before, I have to put him on the top 3.  I wondered who to shoo out, Jackson Bend or First Dude and decided I was strong in feeling Bend would hold up.

I bet Lucky, Bend, Saver.  I lost. Dumb.  lol  So, anyone want to lay odds on whether I'll actually go with my gut insinct. First draw for the Belmot Stakes and if I do, bet that I'll actually lose it?  

LOL - hope you've enjoyed it on my behalf.

In quilting news, I've been quilting my pinwheel quilt in an attempted diagonal lines. Its awful. I've got more ripping than I've ever had to do (and NOT becuase I've been worried about straight lines, either).  I walked away today feeling like I was going to chuch the entire quilt!  No nice words, please. I'm certain IT doesn't deserve them.

I won't chuck it but walking away did give me perspective to say I won't be using it for us like I thought. THe dogs will get it. I'll chalk it up as a "practice different patterns" quilt.  Man, oh man, I was cussing like a sailor I was so mad.

Thank goodness for the wine. Wine has given me perspective. I may hate it but the dogs don't care how its quilted!

Cheers! Beck

Someone Slap me! Kentucky Derby

So the hubs was taking a nap when I placed bets for the derby. I don't bet horses much, only the Triple Crown races. It's a family thing.

Well, he picked the trifecta (the top three in the correct order) just before the race started. My dad said, call in the bet, I said, "nah, we won't bother."

DUMB, DUMB, DUMB!  The hubs would have won $2300 and change off a $2 bet or $23K if he had bet the $20 bet he would have laid down if I called.

Ahh, oh well. It is at least bragging rights for the hubs!

:-)  Good job, hubby. I promise, I'll bet your picks when the Belmont and Preakness Stakes come around.

Public Service Announcement. Yes, for you!

If you notice your machine is getting noisy. Sounds like loose metal clanging and you generally keep your machine clean,

TRY OILING IT!

I changed a bobbin on Ms. Midge yesterday and in the process tried to diagnose the noise I keep hearing. Usually, I only hear the tinging when the bobbin thread is low but this was happening without a bobbin altogether. 

So, I thought, what the heck, I'll oil down there and see what that does. HOLY CRAP... okay, I said the "S" word. NO noise.

I started sewing again and who knew, I actually have a quiet Ms. Midge.  She's only been loud b/c I haven't been paying attention.

So yea, oil your damn machines.

C-ya! Beck

If I were independently wealthy

...I'd quit my job.

...I'd purchase this home. Ferry Landing Home

...I'd purchase a large boat.

...I'd build a small kennel on this property.

...I'd hire someone to clean this home and the kennel.

...I'd hire a kick ass cook for the seasonal events I planned to hold at this home.

...I'd use this home to host dog training sessions for pointers and retrievers.

...finally, I'd use this home to host quilt retreats. If the men wanted to come, I'd get the husband to have a fish and tackle area for fishing on the Potomac. 

...I'd use the boat and hire someone to take the men fishing. The boat would also be used for a great dinner on the water and water cruise up to see DC.

If I were independently wealthy, I'd do all those things even in a smaller home, on a good piece of land, somewhere. If I were independently wealthy, I'd get along fine just doing what I love and opening my home for others to join in and stay awhile. 

Don't you wish I were independently weatlhy?

Cheers! Beck

MIA

Well, the time has come. I've been offline for about 4 days now and already feel I've missed so much with my blogland friends. I'll be peeking in to read but likely not commenting or posting much. I have 2 posts planned for the next 2 weeks since I won't have any real sewing happening. I've saved a tutorial for this occasion and I was given a blog award! I will be posting about both of those soon.

I hope you had a great weekend and the next two weeks fly by as quickly for you as I suspect they will for me since I'll be packing moving boxes, loading trailers and driving 11 hours back and forth a couple times.

Cheers! Beck

I love it!

Google name change!

And good for Topeka, KS... I mean Google, KS. A fun and unique way to have fun in the normal course of business. :)

In the spirit of things... I've rethought my own blog name and have changed it today to, "The Quiet, Shy, Embarrassed, and Unassuming Quilter."

Happy April Fools!

Yum.

This is not quilt related but seeing as how I work from home and have very little adult interaction you get to be the recipient of my thoughts. That said, I've got Ellen on in the background and Gerard Butler is on and I just need to say I love me a rugged looking man! Growing up, the Marlboro Man on the billboards were more yummy than the Brad Pitt's and Johnny Depp's of the world.

So, aside from my rugged, sexy husband... yum, Mr. Butler!   (And he has an accent... he might be my new favorite human eye candy.)

(btw, this might be the first time I noticed him b/c I really don't follow the tabloids or watch a bunch of movies, et.c so bear with me.)  Someone tell me to get back to work!

But I have to ask first, who's your favorite human eye candy? (hey boys, I want your answer too!)

Beck

ps- sewing took a hiatus the last couple days as I battled the aches and sores of being under the weather. Maybe tonight but work is wiping me out so you get misc. posts. -evil grin-

yesterday and today

Yesterday was Nat'l Quilt Day. I didn't sew one damn thing. I awoke to a doggie's bad reaction to a tranquilizer and vaccines and spent 1.5 hrs first thing in the am cleaning said doggie and carpet and kennel, etc.  Then the day went about it's usual business where kid stuff became more important than mom stuff. 

After taking 2 kids to the airport to get out of here and go visit with their dad, I decided to stop at my LQS. I found I had the urge to see bright and pretty fabrics, maybe buy one. After 30 min. browsing, I felt I had to buy more than one. It was time to do something quick for me. I browsed 30 min. more. And then decided what to do. A lap quilt, in bright, sunny colors. Whimsical but not outrageous.

I'm drawn to bright colors with white but I always back off from getting them b/c they go with nothing in the house. Today I decided to hell with it. Eventually I will get my sewing room and it will be a mish-mash of all things I love and inspire me for quilting. I realized that would mean quite a bit of unmatched things.

I also justified the purchase out of my normal comfort zone with the bright idea I would also be able to use this new quilt on my porch when I sit outside, read and drink my bottles and bottles of wine. (Because, not even the wine can keep me from getting a chill on a cool Spring night!) :)

Here are the fabrics. The green will be for backing and maybe the binding. The quilt will be a 4-color bento box pattern and my goal is to have the top (lap size) done by the end of the day.  Wish me luck!

If I have to hem my pants, it means I need a diet.

Did I get your attention with that one? Well, thought I might. I was going to post only a link to AmyLouWho's Sew-n-Tell with a note that I hadn't sewed much since the pinwheels already posted about.  However, I realized, I did sew something today and well, I would count that and tell about it, becuase there is, of course, a story.

A brief disclaimer: For those here to see what I sewed, it's nothing exciting or even inspiring. I literally only hemmed 2 pr of yoga pants. That's it. Scroll past all the text to the shot of legs clad in black if you really feel the need. No, this post is more about why hemming = dieting. Better yet, stop by my pinwheel post from earlier this week if you want to see something slightly creative. :)

First order of business. This is me and DH a few years ago.  Notice my legs. At the time these photos were taken, I was about 5 pounds heavier than when I met DH. It didn't really bother me even though I thought the legs were a little chubby.

I know I was right. I wanted to be less than my 140-145 at the time, I thought 135 would be a respectable weight for the 5'2" mother of two in her mid-late 20s.

But, I honestly didn't bother with it. Just tried to stay healthy and live life. I did well but too many glasses of wine...

led to this:

It may not look like much difference, but it is. I'll be honest. 156 on my 5'2" frame is not looking so good and this is my fess up.

You see, these yoga pants are a 12/14 size. If I have to wear that size for my thighs and hips (and I do) then they are 8-10 inches too long. Today, I had to hem my pants. I did, see?


It also means it's time to focus on losing the fat and toning up again. I want to be the hot chick riding in the mid-life indulgence my hubby got last summer (okay, I mean the hotTER chick).

  

So, like any self respecting person with new found energy to get healthy, I ate some ice cream and decided a veggie pizza for dinner would be the right time to start in earnest.

Cheers! Beck

Happy St. Patrick's Day -sob-

Are you Irish? I'm not but I get to pretend I am on this day, usually.

My husband is Irish. Very Irish... I think he has a famous relative in Ireland kind of Irish! :)
My ex-husband is a bit Irish, too, so all the kids in our house have some Irish blood.

However, today I am sobbing. Me, the only one who is not Irish, only German and Slovak blood here, is the only one who likes corned beef and cabbage! What is WRONG with my family?!

Look at this:

Doesn't this look fantastic? -sigh-  Tonight, we are eating something else. I don't know what, but I think Sat. this house is going to smell divine b/c I am going to get my corned beef and cabbage. And i'm going to drink beer, and I'm going to watch basketball all day.  And dang it! I'm going to pretend I'm Irish 3 days late. The family will just have to deal. You can't please everyone all the time.

If anyone is near me, you have an open invitation to join me! I'll even put you up for the night if you drink too much beer.  :)

Happy St. Patrick's Day!

Cheers, Beck  (ps - tomorrow I have a recipe to post if anyone is interested. Salmon Filet w/a creamy orange champagne sauce. It's pretty interesting and simple.)

Ask yourself, who am I in blogland?

I read this post by my friend at Quliting in My Pyjamas the other day and have been quietly pondering it since.  Today, I'm posting about it and challenge you to ask yourself the question above and post honestly about the answer. 

Are you really you in blogland? Do you let only a part of you out or all of you or do you sanitize it to make it more politically correct or "likeable"?

Here's my answer:

I am 90% me. I do sanitize my posts a bit b/c I can be a sailor some days. For instance, I wrote about being a black cloud the other day. If I wrote what I was really thinking, I might have had some police at my door!  I can't write all my cuss words when they are flowing through my brain on days like that... I can't write about how fucking pissed I am that people can't just leave me alone to wallow in my own self-pity and moroseness until it goes away. 

Really.

If I did that, it would just be rude. Mama taught me that. Mama also might happen upon my blog, read that and then show up at my door. I love my mama and I don't want any visit from her to start with a slap across the face (or hands) as it may be. -wink- 

Then again, it could also be because I know that while I can/do have a tendency some days to swear like a sailor, I know I don't enjoy hearing it or reading it much so I try to sanitize and refrain myself.

How else? I sanitize what I say about family. Mostly, this is for security reasons (with the hubs being in a leadership position and now a public leadership position, I know to be careful) but also, in part, because I think if I'm going to write regularly about family and friends, good or bad, it might best be in a blog dedicated to that subject instead of my quilting adventures. However, because 90% of this is me, I do mention them and introduce them to those of you willing to meet them. 

Sometimes, I catch myself after a post wondering, "What do people think?"  For example, after I pray to the quilting goddesses. I really wonder, "am I the only one?" I was born and raised Roman Catholic. I'm raising my kids this way. I do believe in one God but really, I don't talk about that. I post my tongue-in-cheek posts to the quilting goddesses and wonder, does anyone think I really believe I think they are messing with or helping me? Then, those 2 seconds of thought are replaced with something more important, like, what can I get for a snack, and I forget about it until the next prayer.  But those posts never have too many comments so I never know...

I've learned alot about myself in my quilting adventures through blogging and that is, I like talking about quilting and I really, really enjoy meeting others and seeing their creative streaks. I can't get to guild meetings and such so this is an awesome alternative for me.  There are those I follow because they always have good ideas or a great eye. Good projects. There are those I follow b/c they are great teachers.  Then there are others I follow b/c their personality speaks to mine. So I feel it's necessary for me to present an accurate picture of myself (regardless of who comes back) so expectations of who/what I'm about don't disappoint me or anyone who reads.

For instance, that friend I mentioned at the beginning of this post. If I were to go to Australia one day, I'd be asking her where she was so I could try to get around to visit with her. To meet her live. She's one of those few I feel I'd love to know in real life and through some email exchanges, for my part, I feel we've gone from acquaintance to blog friends to friends.  (It could have been my awesome personality but really, I think it was when she discovered the fabulous Bakerella from me and realized we had an affinity for all things sweet and shared a common "that bitch" mentality. lol -that was just for you Ms. P!)

Still, I feel pretty good that aside from the beginning hiccups about what to write about and getting comfortable doing it, I think I'm as much "me" to the blogland public as I am to the public in front of me.  I've never cared too much if someone didn't like me and I've never felt the need to build my popularity through political correctness or false pretenses. 

There is one life possibility I keep a hold of, though, which does dictate my need to at least be somewhat polite and courteous. If I ever want to open my own business after the kids are grown, I won't have anything behind me or attached to my moniker which could cause me embarrassment.  If I can't be me, though, in all my sarcastic glory, then I can't be happy and I want my communications now, to pave the way for that possible future if that's what I want then.

Oh, and to answer a couple of questions my gal-pal asked in her post? No, not everyone homeschools. I'd kill my kids if I did this (see? no sanitization there today but normally I might have said that a bit less abruptly since tone cannot come across as well written instead of spoken). No, not everyone goes to church every week. My kids were never breastfed, slept in my bed, and were left to cry-it-out (horror of horrors!). I slapped my teenage daughter once for looking me in the face and lying to me while knowing I knew she was lying and doing it anyway (sanitization note: this was not a hard soap-opera slap. It was a get her attention don't think about doing that crap again, slap).  Never thought I'd do that, but I did.  I've told my husband to shut up. I've had petulant tantrums myself and frankly, still think I'm right, I don't care what we are talking about!  So, we aren't all perfect, we just don't advertise the faults. If I were to let the hubs on here one week to post about me... well, the world of our home would look very different.  Rose colored glasses and all...

Bottom line, omission in my view doesn't limit me from being me on this blog and thanks for those of you who enjoy my writings enough to come around repeatedly. I use it to tell my hubby how important I am! -wink-

Now, answer that question yourself. It may be an affirmation or an eye opener. It may be something you want to leave as is or maybe change. I don't know but I do want to say, thanks to Ms. P for being courageous enough to bring this up the other day and to make me ponder.

For me, I've got to go. I'm off to get some leftover chocolate to the third (chocolate, chocolate chip with chocolate frosting) birthday cake and milk. It's just something I have to do.

(Edited to add, per a question posed in the comments: What is my pet peeve when browsing blogs?  I think the phrase pet peeve is too strong but in general, blogs with lots of blinking notes or sidebar items, with snow or leaves falling and mouse trailers, or with difficult to find or read text I do find annoying. I stick to annoying instead of peeve b/c I susbcribe to the theory that if I find it difficult to read or unenjoyable, I leave. The blogger likes it and that's all that matters. Of course, I was never one to draw on my notebooks in school, either so there you have it.)

Black Cloud - NQR

Me. I am the black cloud today. It was gloomy/rainy outside but now I see the sun peeking through. My mood has not changed.



I am in a foul mood. I am angry. Just sour. Perhaps self-pitying, tired of having patience and getting kicked for it. I'm ready to fight, take on the beast and just get things done but I know that would only make it worse and so because I cannot do anything and because I do not see when this situation will end (I know it will someday, I just don't know if it's going to be 3 months or 6 month), I am in a foul mood.



Honest to God, if this were the movies and I was a witch, I'd have the dark backdrop. The dark clothes, the don't f-ing look at me lest I strike you dead with the heat of my eyes and sneering twist of my lips aura.



I am a black cloud today but even so, I have been productive. Getting work done through my anger and frustration. Paid bills (yipee), am blogging today (which was my goal) even if it's not about quilting, and haven't killed the only other living things with me at the moment, my dogs - so it can't be all bad, right?



Ugh. I'm just mad.



Enough said.



Please wish for sun for tomorrow's soccer games so I can get out of doors and physically brighten myself.  This mood has been coming on for the last couple of days and my body needs a physical jolt out of it!

I've been thinking

which, invariably, leads to drinking and then moves to crazy ideas.  I am definately not the college student anymore, 2 bottles of Mike's Hard Apple Cider over the space of 4.5 hours (I'm a sipper) and I'm ready to sleep.  Just call me "Sleepy" tonight. :)

Anyway, my family has some changes coming up and some planning to do. We've sold our home in VA while living in TN (hooray!) but, come May, we need to find a new place to live. It looks like we will be going from one rental to another for a couple months or so until we can find a permanent residence. Unfortunately, finances and timing won't work for us to move just once instead of twice. That's stressful enough, but now we have decided it's a good time to plan vacations before hubby retires (Feb) from the military.

In June, we want to take a family vacation and then later this summer, if I can find someone to take my kids (grandma, you there?) the hubs and I are taking a long overdue vacation. We haven't had more than a weekend in over 5 years.  Then we went to Ireland. This time, I'm thinking Tuscany. My goal, to come back sated and inebriated. -wink- (sense a theme tonight?)

Anyway, my thinking is about that family vacation. I want to do something we don't normally get to do but what? What for the teen/tweens that is fun but toucehes on something unique to the US/North America? A few days sightseeing around the Grand Canyon or maybe a trip to Niagra Falls. We will be starting from the No. VA areas for this trip so what to do? Throw ideas at me ladies and gents. I need to get researching costs.

I think renting an RV will cost too much and driving any distance would really stink but... why not fly to a region of the US like hubby and I did in Ireland, then rent a care and drive every couple days to another part of the region to see it? Hmm...

Any other ideas?  I'm sorry I've rambled a bit but well, 9pm now and hard cider, okay?

Cheers! Beck